hey...

...check out linda bergkvist's site...she has updated it with some cool stuff...

i sense a long entry...

...probably not, cuz i am very busy this week...

shit...

...i feel so not streetsmart...

some random thoughts

"我要双大胸部..."that is wad steph sun should be singing, instead of "我要一座大房子..."

urgh...

...disgusted by the naiveity of some. not that i want to say who tho...maybe they are just faking it...ha. at the mean time, ulcers are developing on the cheek lining of my mouth...painful and disgusting. my head is further plagued by the existence of a renewed growth of acne after the streak of doing duty. must be the dirty and dusty fans and pillow cases...

should i?

or should i not?

hmmm...

find me a counsellor

i find it really hard to counsel myself lately to the extent that i am really bent on getting one for myself. it's been quite long since i have blogged any substantial stuff on this decaying site. i have been contemplating the motives of various people to the extent of being a tad paranoid. quoting ms sharon phua, my favourite GP teacher, "there are no true friendships in this world, but they are based on common interests". i actually cannot say that it is an exact quote since i do not know exactly wad she said, but u get the point. with weehao's help i managed to get this very close approximation of wad she had said. ah, if only i had my GP file with me.

that quote set me thinking. are friendships really based on common interests? something like a symbiotic relationship?(symbiosis?) from my experience in recent years, yes. i am going to say crude stuff here, but ya, it's wad i feel. u get married, why? for a reason right? pple get married for sex, to reproduce, to buy HDB flats. correct? u get married cuz u love each other, mostly, this reason is bullshit. dun u agree? same reason u get a boyfren/girlfren. satisfy your sexual desires, impress pple, show pple that you are attractive and is able to have a parasite clinging onto you at any moment. i am not saying all relationships are like that, but most are.(the important lessons u learnt from ms phua: dun generalise) if u are attractive, blablabla, you dun need to have a bf/gf. the pple around u can be your gfs/bfs. to kiss and touch each other is just an excuse. why do we seperate our frens into gf/bf and normal frens? wad the heck is normal frens? it's like u called a fren you have known for say 5 years a normal fren and someone you just know like for 1 year ur bf/gf? and only give priority to the latter? in my opinion, until u get married, everyone is ur normal fren. it's really quite sick and irritating to hear stuff like, u are only my normal fren, its awkward to go out with u alone. wad the hell? wad's wrong with that? i think we shouldn't have this kind of preconception, that normal friends, as most pple call it, cannot go on normal dates 1 on 1, especially if they are of opposite sex.

ok, i seem to be digressing from ms phua's million dollar quote. i find that in life, like in the corporate world, there are conglomerates, mncs and then there are small individual businesses. i think i belong to the small indi biz sector. the conglomerates are pple with lots and lots of frens and the small indi biz are well, the opposite. but, conglomerates rarely have any connection or relation with SIBs unless, unless they are extremely despo, finding no help in their mega corporate world and turning to the SIBs for small projects and then, after ther transactions are done, they will have no reason wadsoever to do with the SIBs. but if SIBs have to do this, it says that these big firms know that the SIBs are bloody good to the extent that these conglomerates are willing to risk and work with them. interesting analogy ain' it? please dun copy it please. :)
but in the corporate world, this is acceptable. but if it happens in our personal life, i can't stand it.

too bad it's happening...

just as...

...i thought my duty streak was well and over, i was activated again yesterday. doing suty is damn sian. lucky there's a new rp in the block, as weird as he is, he still makes a better duty personnel than me. cuz why? i am downgrading mar...haha.

i hate it...

ya, the feeling of doing duty really sucks. the next day off will be spent sleeping. i tried not sleeping but in the end i did. but ya, at least i managed to borrow the books that i wanted. i am rather excited abt the HK trip...altho i have been there before this year. i think it's the disneyland ba...i hope it doesn't let me down. but how to? considering that this is the puniest and mulnutrition-ed park of all to be built.

yeah

finally booked my holiday...altho it's a 3 day tour only...free and easy...i think it would be a good opportunity for me to be independent cuz i will be bringing my brother about HK...haha. can't wait to see the skyline of hk.

bloody hungry!

idiot...

...i am typing this in a fit of anger cuz i had poured water which i thought was hot water into my cup noodles...and wad happened? the bloody water was cold...shit. waste my money and the noodle. idiot. anyway, i am back from sunday duty. i hate the feeling of not being able to sleep peacefully and i think i am getting a headache now. shit.

ok, at least there was a consolation, my brother wants to join me to go HK...but not confirmed yet. but if he goes...i wun be able to have the buffet at las vegas sands. but i can get to go chef mickey's at HKDL.

open day

urgh...tiring

hi...

...i was on an alma mater visiting spree these past 2 days. it's been fun and quite heart warming to know that the teachers still rememeber me and say stuff like "you are so supportive", "fabian is the best" bla bla bla...haha...head grow big liaoz...hahaha. it's been fun. heh. well, yesterday i went back to rv and got some good stuff to eat cuz i went at the right time...heh. mrs chan also promised me and the art gang a free treat cuz i went to help her do computer illustrations...heh. ya, tml's rv's open house and NJ's too.

oh ya, my juniors' works are far more artistic and experimental than my batch's. it's really different...deviates from the stereotypical A level course works that batches of aep students have been doing for years! haha...good job guys!

too tired...

...that's why....

something more constructive

i sure dun want to spend this off day in front of the comp, or the tv...but if i go out, it means i will have to spend money. ha...i am tempted to buy spectrum 13...but...it's ex. well, maybe not as ex as the ballistic books i have bought. come to think of it, it's almost half the price of the ballistic books...ya, i better hurry down to bras basah either today or tml or saturday to get it. i will be doing duty this sunday, wonder how that feels. ha, first time doing guard duty too. this off came in just in time. i cannot stand the feeling of not being able to sleep...sucks. i cannot stand having my biological clock going haywire too. f-ed up feeling. had gone thru that once, shall not want to go thru it anymore. shit, someone is frying pork chops, i cna smell it. idiot.

yesterday was the last episode of dae chang guem. in my opinion, the ending sucks. really...i was still like huh?! u call that an ending?! it's so anti climatic and, to put it bluntly, a waste of my time following the whole series. but anyway, thank God that the series ended...if not i will have to catch less sleep by watching the re-runs at 12.30 am. really...and ya...i can go out after work in the future, instead of rushing home to the tv. actaully i was bored after lady cui and her lackeys were being punished, cuz that's the whole point of watching the show isn't it. oh ya, there will be no more "마마님"s(pronounced as "ma ma nim", korean for madam), "초나"s(pronouced as "cho na", korean for your majesty)being enuciated by the palace maids and chang jin. these words are being said and said time and time again to the extent of being an irritant. ok, other that these, i have no qualms abt the show. great show, bad ending.

haha...

...just to haolian to u all abit on my progress of korean(note: i still cannot understand it, but can translate foreign and korean names into written korean), this is my name in korean: 반탱졍. it's pronounced as pan taeng jyeong, it's translated from my cantonese name( fan teng jiong), since canto sounds abit like korean. in case u are wondering why my korean surname is pronounced as 'pan' instead of 'fan', it's cuz in korean lang, they do not have, or utilise the 'f' or 'ahf' sound. haha...now you know. a trivia a day keeps the 'F's away...hehe

anyway, another trivia for you guys: great word city is a great place(if not...IDEAL place) to spot SPGs( sarong party girls and some sarong party guys). guaranteed plus chop there will have one...if u dun see them, ur eyes must be pasted with stamps. it's rather sad having your eyes pasted with stamps...i have tried it before, your eyes feel terribly uncomfortable after wards...then, like clams with their shells clammed shut, you will have a hard time having to open your eyelids...muahahah. too much crap, must stop. anyway, the spg in gwc urban legend is true! go see for yourself. great place to spot hermione granger(emma watson) lookalikes from international schools.

i din manage to blog because...

...i was activated yesterday...that means...i had to do duty in place of someone. yep, but heng it's CM type of duty. which only involves me sleeping...i am not really complaining, although i missed the 3rd last episode od dae chang guem. haha...

finally had tempura icecream today...and got a sort of long weekend. kind of excited to go to NJ's open house this saturday...haha. aiya...still cannot find many pple to go to Hk with me...haiz...if this year cannot go must wait till next year leh...i dun want! actually i dun mind saving up money this year for japan next year...cuz tower of terror is opening at disneyseas!!! triple 'yeahs' for me...and disneysea as well. haha.

please...

...stop spamming my comments. anw, who is interested in going to HK at the end of this year?! please reply asap!

ahn nyong ha se yo?

urgh...i am trying quite hard to learn korean...dun ask me why...cuz i am bored, i want to learn new things, i love languages, i want to be multi lingual...bla bla bla and so on. i am terribly lost now...the feeling of sadness i had felt months ago is back...sick...why? why must our mind work like this...when u are bored, u feel sad...sian. nvm, next week is NJ's open house....got freebies...i will be wearing...urm...maybe i can try wearing my NJ uniform back...haha.

2005's been a slack and quite a happening year for me...depends on how u view the word "happening" haha. yupz...slack...cuz really...for one whole damn year, i do not have to bury my bloody head in books and think abt stupid concepts such as forces, power and dunno wad other shit. then...happening cuz i got my A level results(which were rather surprising), got myself into the mess of being in the army and then broke my leg cuz of SOC, or as i like to call it...sadistic obstacle course. then...slack cuz following that, i had an ultra long vacation break from the army and, poof, 6 months plus of my army life gone just like that.

shit, my ulcer still hasn't healed.

btw, we had fun today at ACM...the exhibits were real eye openers..ha. i would like to buy over the whole ACM...as convert it into my house...i shall do plans of it soon...the location of this house will be awesome, huge halls to invite my guests for parties and functions. then i can even have my own movie theaterette...haha. and ya, altho today's crowd was small...we certainly enjoyed ourselves...ha. i love love love my slack days...hope it will never end! hahahaha. ok, at this point of time i am experiencing some sort of insanity streak...ok, it's over now.

back to more serious stuff, i guess if i really want to go AA to pursue a course in illustration, i guess i will first have to go NTU then proceed to AA for my masters. but then again, should i stay in archi? cuz wad design firms want is a good portfolio. if i were to take archi, i would have more paths...or should i say, more prospects in the not so far away future. but the path thru archi is gruelling...and probably too technical and theorectical for me...this i must confirm first. haiz haiz haiz. and more haiz. most of my posts are like monologues, me talking to myself and answering to myself...

aiya...shall go sleep and ahn nyong hee ka se yo!

bonked...

haiz...wad to do...wad to do?

Random thoughts over the week

yes...this week's rp job for me has been relatively enjoyable...partly because i've got lots more to chat about...ha. ya, funny thing happened today when uncle johnson asked me to help him draw ah-hem type of comics in the future...and wad an apt way to ask: while i was in facing the urinal doing my business. well...if there's monetary returns, i wouldn't mind...AT ALL! it's art anyway...ha. and ACCORDING to uncle johnson, it's for a good cause. i do hope he was serious and wasn't in a state of drunken stupor. i think it should not be lor, i think it should be more of a "xing xue lai chao" when he saw me walk past him in which my destination is the loo.

oh ya, i find it very impossible to sleep in the rp guardrest. today was my second time going there to take a breather and snooze out for a while after manning the metal detector for straight 6hours...to be more exact, it's from 8.30am to 3.30pm...oh...so that is 7hours.

anyway, i am happy enough to be able to eat my favourite za jiang mian and jiu cai he zi which i haven swallowed since 2 months plus ago...yup.

oh, my blasted ulcer still hasn't healed at all!

there is a new rp ic(was there even one before?!)...

my new nickname is morgan(if u have a deprived childhood, it's one of the teddies in bananas in pyjamas), go figure why. why am i associated with teddy bears?

why am i so poor?

freakin AA costs a bomb for me to study there...freak. please note that i am substituting "freak" for the F word, for politeness sake. freaking stupid idiotic school fees...freak you...freak freak freak...

i have been...

...eating those rice crackers non stop...they bring back childhood memories and are so absolutely delicious. just hope that by doing so i am not overloading on my carbo...

good news...

blogger's typo interface is back to normal...gosh...i am so damn tired...

无论...

...how hard i try, i cannot injest this yellowish, bitter, gassy and albeit sour-ish drink called beer. tried heineken...yuck...gross...same goes for the other types of beer. the only alcoholic drink i can swallow is vodka...but only at small quantities...

at your service

i have always had this idea of having a portrait painting service. price not expensive. $20 for A4 watercolour pics, $12 for BW pencil. hmmm...i dunno abt the price...hmmm...i dunno, really. cuz i know nuts on how to calculate profits and loss. told ya, i know nuts abt econs atho i took it...stupid choice really. anyway, i am on a language spree nowadays, trying to learn and grasp as many languages my mind can hold...i want to be like the pro NUS prof, can speak and write 14 diff langs!!!!!

i have...

...finally mastered how to write and read(sort of) korean...altho i dun understand the meanings...urgh. btw, i forgot to blog on sunday and this entry is to make up for yesterday's. i realised that my entries are getting shorter and shorter, not because i can't be bothered to write. but cuz i am bogged down by too many things to think abt that i dunno where to start...bloggers block, or should i say, blog.

alvin alvin bek a cake...hee

as the title suggest, i, or rather, we, saw alvin alvin bek-a-cake at suntec starbucks just now...this week end is rather fulfilling...did alot of good stuff. i think the rhumba is great...hehe...